Welcome to Surviving and Thriving in The Rough Love Road Marriage & Family podcast. This is episode #14. My name is Daniel Whyte III, president of Gospel Light Society International. I am married to my first and only wife, the former Meriqua Althea Dixon, of Christiana, Jamaica, for over 32 years, and God has blessed our marriage with seven children. The simple purpose of this podcast is to help husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and children understand that true Christian marriage and family life in most cases will be a Rough Love Road experience. The Christian marriage and family is designed to break you, make you, and mold you to be what you need to be for the glory of God. And contrary to lying, hypocritical and phony Christian leaders and people today who fake like that is not the case or compromise to try to make it not the case, thus violating God’s Holy Word, the Bible, and contrary to most Christian authors today on the family, to have a victorious Christian marriage and family it is not about cute techniques, manipulation and compromise, it is about simple obedience to the Bible especially in Ephesians chapters 5 and 6, working from a position of Godly authority with the husband (male) being the head of every marriage and family under God and Jesus Christ, and the wife (female) being in submission to her husband whether she likes it or not, and with the children being in obedience to their parents whether they like it or not. So marriage and family will be a Rough Love Road experience and, yes, it will take “tough love” as well. The only way to have your family to turn out well “in time to come” is by simply being obedient to God’s Holy Word whether you feel like it or not. Which in other words means staying together with your first spouse and not divorcing, which is your biggest sign of success. By the way, I am very sorry, but this podcast is not for divorced people, it is designed for young couples who are determined to stick it out no matter what, it is for couples who may have had some problems in the past but are determined to obey God and stay together no matter how they feel, and it is for people who believe that keeping their vows to God and staying together and not divorcing is a worthy goal and means success in marriage in God’s sight, and for people for whom divorce is simply not an option. Any compromise, any games, any lies will cause your family to be a failure as opposed to being victorious.
Our scripture passage for this episode is Ephesians 5:25 which states, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;”
Now, allow me to share with you more commentary on this passage from David Guzik:
3. (Eph 5:25a) The simple command to Christian husbands: love your wife.
Husbands, love your wives,
a. Husbands, love your wives: Paul’s words to Christian husbands safeguards his previous words to wives. Though wives are to submit to their husbands, it never excuses husbands acting as tyrants over their wives.
i. According to 2 Timothy 1:7, God has given us the spirit of power – but also of love. Power, in their Christian life, is always to be exercised in love. “It is not naked power, it is not the power of a dictator or a little tyrant, it is not the idea of a man who arrogates to himself certain rights, and tramples upon his wife’s feelings and so on, and sits in the home as a dictator… No husband is entitled to say that he is the head of the wife unless he loves his wife… So the reign of the husband is to be a reign and a rule of love; it is a leadership of love.” (Lloyd-Jones)
Our quote for this episode is from John MacArthur. He said, “What higher motive could there be for the husband to love his wife? By loving her as Christ loved the church, he honors Christ in the most direct and graphic way. He becomes the embodiment of Christ’s love to his own wife, a living example to the rest of his family, a channel of blessing to his entire household, and a powerful testimony to a watching world.”
In this podcast, we are using the late John R. Rice’s classic book: “The Home—Courtship, Marriage and Children: A Bible Manual of 22 Chapters on the Christian Home.”
We continue with Chapter 1: Marriage and Home (Part 12):
III. Marriage Is the Most Intimate Human Relationship
In poetry and song through the ages men have made much of the love of a mother. On Mother’s Day every year, cards are sent by the millions with loving verses, ascribing to mother all the highest virtues, all the tenderest sentiments. Many times people say that, “The best friend you will ever have is your mother.” But I want to press on the heart of every reader that the most intimate and precious human relationship is not that of mother and child. It is the relationship of husband and wife.
Mother’s love is very tender. It is a miracle of God’s mercy that He gives to each of us a loving mother. My own mother has been in Heaven since before I was six years old, and I have missed her with a loneliness unspeakable. How I long to see her! How glad I am that she talked to me about the Lord, that she called me her “preacher boy,” that she gave me to God when I was born and made me promise, as she lay on her deathbed, that I would meet her in Heaven! I thank God for the tender ties between a mother and her child.
But after all, there are many limitations to the mother-child relationship. For one thing, it is mostly one-sided. The mother loves the child when her love cannot adequately be returned. The mother gives; the child takes. That is not an equal relationship. After awhile, the mother’s heart is often broken by the fact that the child’s love turns elsewhere to other companions, other friends, and at last to a permanent mate. You see the mother-child relationship has a tendency to degenerate and become less binding. Children move away from home. The tie of a mother’s love cannot hold the boy who learns to love a girl and wants to marry her. You see, mother’s love has its human limitation. Great and sweet as it is, the mother-child relationship is not the most intimate, not the most precious, not the most blessed.
Often, in fact, mother-love is selfish. Ofen mother-love would keep for herself the young life that ought to be spent on the world. Boys and girls ought oftentimes to leave home and go out in the world to find other duties, other homes, other mates and companions. That is God’s ordained law. Mother-love often regrets it, for mothers are only human after all, and mother-love is circumscribed by many selfish motives and desires and by limited vision, in the very nature of the case. Mother-love is not the greatest of loves. The mother-child relationship is not the sweetest nor the most intimate nor the most blessed relationship.
— PRAYER —
Now, if you and your family do not know the Lord Jesus Christ as your Savior, here’s how to.
First, accept the fact that you are a sinner, and that you have broken God’s law. The Bible says in Romans 3:23: “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.”
Second, accept the fact that there is a penalty for sin. The Bible states in Romans 6:23: “For the wages of sin is death…”
Third, accept the fact that you are on the road to hell. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 10:28: “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” Also, the Bible states in Revelation 21:8: “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”
Now this is bad news, but here’s the good news. Jesus Christ said in John 3:16: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”
Just believe in your heart that Jesus Christ died for your sins, was buried, and rose from the dead by the power of God for you so that you can live eternally with Him. Pray and ask Him to come into your heart today, and He will.
Romans 10:9-13 says, “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”