Brian Tome: It’s Time to Rethink How We’re Raising Boys to Become Men

Why do we have so many guys from the college campus to the corporate C-Suite to the Hollywood and political elite dishonoring and devaluing women? As stories of boys behaving badly continue, we can no longer only ask what is wrong with them. This isn’t just a story about an individual. It’s about a sizable segment of the male population in America.

Our culture is scarred with the need for males to leave boyhood and become real men. It’s not only the truth behind the anecdotal stories of the #metoo movement. It is also the empirical statistics like males being 3.5x more likely to die of suicide. And look at the gender of every mass shooting suspect.

Males in our culture are in crisis about a life that mainstream civilization conditions us to mindlessly follow after. Consider these cultural touchpoints that help explain why so many men devalue and dishonor so many women.

Our culture’s males aren’t saying “no” to other males.

There are 45-year-old boys and there are 15-year-old men. One of the things that separates a men from the boys is his willingness to say something unpopular. I’m tired of hearing celebrities say “I never knew he was doing that.” Please. Yes you did. You were just too weak to do something about it. Male passivity in refusing to speak truth to other males has become a cultural norm. The true men among us need to rise up and get comfortable saying, “I see what you’re doing, and it isn’t acceptable.”

Our culture objectifies women.

Why does USA Today contain a standard feature of 100+ pics of cheerleaders around the NFL? Those women are earning a living. Giving men regular and unnecessary reminders of how women look and seem to exist to turn you on doesn’t help a man reinforce a healthy and proper stereotype of women.

Hitler succeeded in turning Germany against the Jews by objectifying them as rats. Plantation owners objectified Africans as subhuman. When women are seen as sex objects in sports pages, they lose. Our culture has done a great job at conditioning men to look at women as objects of pleasure.

Our culture’s men lack healthy outlets for adventure.

When a man pursues a woman, it’s a hunt. For many overworked and under-stimulated men, this is the only adventure they will experience in the course of their year. Lack of healthy adventure, coupled with the grind of life, makes us more prone to the quick-hitting unhealthy adventure of inappropriately coming onto a woman. One of the reasons a man pursues a woman he shouldn’t is that he doesn’t have anything more stimulating or fulfilling to pursue.

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Source: Christian Post